I finally finished Hearts of Wisdom: American Women Caring for Kin, 1850-1940, by Emily K. Abel. I found it helped me step back from my own experience, see it in a much larger context. She ends the book with some lessons for the future, including this:
Women who view caregiving as a way to achieve greater intimacy with care recipients, to demonstrate competence, and even to attain "hearts of wisdom" want to be relieved of intolerable burdens, not to upload all their responsibilities on the state.
I got home Saturday night from a conference in Rochester NY, though it was a near thing because of a seriously delayed flight. I did get one call from John while I was away about a door inside the house that he thought had somehow become locked--it turned out it was just stuck. I had caught up on sleep some while away but I still felt very tired yesterday, setting back in after my trip. John went with friends to an art exhibit in Atlanta and had a good time.